Reporting in for yesterday and so far today.
Well yesterday - what can I say dinner at the boys = pigout.
Breaky - Cereal - 150 cals
Lunch - prawn shirataki noodles and capsicum - 200 cals
Dinner - 2 slice of pizza, a pce of fish and a tomato - 542
Total = 892 :/ eep
Today so far I have had
Breaky - 150 cals
coffee - 10 cals
sushi - 200 ? I dont really know but I didn't have much
= 360 already and I am meant to be going out with friends to drink tonight - god darn, I really can not afford to purge, the chest pain is getting worse. I have bloods and xray next week fun...
Weigh in - Just ten mins ago = 53.7 kg (that's with all the food)
Saturday I am just going to go to work then come home, and maybe visit my gran before her heart op on Monday.. so hopefully limited intake there The boy is going on a roadtrip with a mate over the weekend so there will be less eating I spose...
I quit my job yesterday - 6more shifts and I am out of there.. they want to try and keep me but I really think I need a new change and chapter in my life. I get bored easily I have moved interstate so many times, and moved house at least 4 times in the past few years.. I think a new career option will be on the cards... maybe retail. I hated having an office job sitting on my ass all day feeling my thighs, butt and gut expand -I need to be on my feet, in view of people so that way I will feel compelled to be thin as everyone will be glaring at me!
Rant:
I hope everyone is doing well, staying positive and feeling beautiful. I am reading so much lately about girls falling into the arms of self harm. I am not one to make judgement - I have been there and at the time thought it was the perfect release, but I realized I cherished my life and when I am thin I want to show off my bones - with no scars. I just hope everyone is being safe if they are going to do what they feel they need to - if there is such a way. There is always light at the end of the tunnel and I know it doesn't have to involve self harm. Helplines and websites can be great support networks, and I highly recommend that if you at times feel no one else is there and no one gives a shit - people in fact really do sometimes our troubles and stresses of life blind us to the support and love that is SOMEWHERE out there whether it can be immediately found or is waiting to be discovered it is well worth the wait and patience, as with pure happiness - I truly believe it can be found and I am on a journey to find it!
End Rant
XO - Pixie.
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